Thanks for your comments =)

I like a lot of your ideas and will consider those when editing. I didn't really realize the dramatic style change, but I do see it now.

And yes, I love that last line.

I agree with Aaronicus, I really like this piece, and I've never had to write a college essay or anything close to it, so instead I'll give the only error I found in the essay: When you say "not a day goes by that I don’t regret starting sooner", I think what you mean to say is you don't regret NOT starting sooner. It's just a small thing, and I might think about rephrasing the sentence so it's not as confusing to read.

A couple things:

First, Did you march Cadets 2007? ... OK, now that that's out of the way...

The Miriam Webster defines "xxx" has become so overdone - Perhaps an opening line like, "The word 'Music' has many different contextural definitions whether describing a feeling, a style, use as a noun, or an adverb. However the formal entry for the word Music in the XXX dictionary is ---.

Another thing that stood out to me was the use of 'comes in' about names or styles of music. I'd rather see something like, "Traditionally, we try to compartmentalize Music into easily grasped catagories with names such as Country, Rock, Classical, etc... but simply the definition of Music lends itself to more, much more, to the point of defining some people's lifes.

At that point I would transition into bringing up some examples of how music has defined the life's of some major figures in which turning points in history can be credited to musical expression. (Chuck Berry's guitar style, The Beatles coming to America, Elvis, the Hippie generation...)
From there make the move to music's effect on your personal state of mind and chosen path through life.

Take out the "This reminds me of a story I read in the news not too long ago." and start the paragraph with "In February... (the fact).

Thanks for all your constructive criticism, it's quite helpful. I'm seeing things now I didn't see before and that's a very good thing.

I like a lot of the ideas everyone has posted and will definitely consider making some additions and revisions with those in mind.

The only "brick wall" in the way of adding more stuff is the fact that there is a limit of 500 words and I'm at 498...

Also, I have learned the hard way to never write an essay in first person. It is not that you cannot do it, it is just not the "correct" way to write, so, in stead of saying "This remind me of..." and "I..." You could write, "A good example or reminder is..."

But overall, great essay, and I think Aaronicus hit the nail on the head.

I find music to be something with out a definition, something more than can be described.

I want to comment very specificly on the data playback conversation earlier first. The difference between a cd player and a human, even a begginer, is that people will add soul to it. Feeling, play it with their own kind of slang. They INTERPRET not just play back.

Otherwise music is one of those terms like energy in physics. It's just generally understood but lacks concreteness. We know its there, we can point it out when we hear it, but we can't really say what it is. Some of us hear it places others don't and that's cool. It depends on how you're listening and what you're listening for. If it moves and grooves your soul then its music to you.

I apologize for not sticking with technical definitions but as music is an art of love I think it should spoken about not defined.

How did the essay turn out?

Music, oh where does it begin to become defined at all?

If I had to say anything, it is "a use of sound in a controlled or uncontrolled sense..." I don't know where to go from there. What I do know is that music writing is VERY structured. However, there's nothing stopping you from breaking those rules to create a piece. Example: "4:33." It is a piano piece where the performer literally doesn't play a single note for four minutes and 33 seconds. The AUDIENCE makes the music, because within that amount of time, someone or something is going to make noise. These noises contribute to the overall piece.

So, what is music? To me, the question involves a lot of thought process that I should be thinking eventually as a music major. However, it's 12:22 in the morning, and I just want to chilax on DLO. In the end, though, it truly can be either a very easy or very difficult answer

A very musical post there - thank you.

*See, I just made some noise while you were waiting - how musical of me!